I just got back from a wonderfully relaxing camping trip to the Utah desert.
Other than, “Which trail should we hike?” and “Which of the meals we brought along should we have for supper?” life was pretty much planned out for us: Get up. Make breakfast. Hike.
As we were heading for home, it struck me–it’s not the busyness of life and work that overwhelm me. It’s the things that go along with work.
The decisions. The expectations. The fears. All those things that make work harder than it needs to be. All the things that are missing on a camping trip.
I wondered, “Is there any way to make regular life more peaceful?” Here are a few of the ideas I came up with.
7 Ways to Stop Being Overwhelmed
1. Find out why you’re overwhelmed.
It helps to know why we’re overwhelmed. Is it too much work, or is it something more subtle than that? Maybe we’re trying to make everyone happy. Or we’re upset because life isn’t fair. Or we feel like we have to succeed. We’ll feel less overwhelmed when we deal with those emotional issues.
2. Renew your mind.
I always regret it when I muscle through the day in an “I-have-to-get-this-done” frenzy. When I finally take the time to renew my mind and come to peace, I think, “Why didn’t I do that earlier?”
The truth is, we work better if we’re working in fellowship with God and seeing life from His perspective.
Here are a few tools you can use to renew your mind when you’re overwhelmed: A good and bad list, procrastination truths, people pleasing questions, or fear of failure questions. The worry questions on my app are also helpful if you have that.
3. Figure out what you can and can’t do.
We often have far too much on our to-do list. Sometimes it helps to take a break and ask, “Do I really have time for this?” Then let go of the things we don’t have time for.
4. Prioritize.
If you have too much to do, make a list and prioritize it. Try to put both the most important and the most dreaded tasks at the top of your list. The most important, for obvious reasons. And the most dreaded, because they sap your energy until you get them out of the way.
If possible, try to only have one or two emotionally draining tasks on your list each day and do them right away in the morning.
5. Focus.
Once you’ve made your list, try to block it from your mind and focus on the current task.
6. Set boundaries.
If you’re a workaholic, make a commitment to stop working at a certain time of the day–even if you still have work to do. You may want to renew your mind at the end of the work day so you can mentally let go.
If you struggle with laziness, make a list each day and renew your mind whenever you don’t feel like doing the next thing on the list.
7. Remember that life is about loving God and others.
Whenever we start making life about things other than God, we get messed up. We feel like we have to have those things to be happy. Then when it doesn’t look like we’re going to get them, we get stressed out.
When we make life about God, any sort of life is good. Including a life where we don’t get everything done.
Discussion: What overwhelms you? What helps you feel less overwhelmed?
Great post. I always try to get the things I dread the most done the soonest. Like eating the vegetables off the plate as a kid… It is also the responsibilities and expectations put on us by the “rule” mindset. I ended a one sided friendship last week with a person I felt bad for and Biblically responsible to be there for that person. It wasn’t really a friendship it was me being there to be heard and overtime subtly abused. There comes a time we gotta shake off our sandals and restore our soul. Great points.
I wish I had that habit of doing things I dread the most first, Floyd – I’m working on it. Interesting point on the rules mindset. Expectations can definitely be a stressor. I have to continually remind myself to look for what God wants me to do rather than what everyone else is expecting me to do. Life is much simpler when I seek to please Him rather than everyone else!
Barb, excellent points. I usually overwhelm myself with trying to do too many things at one time. I overwhelm myself to the point that I get nothing done. I am learning to say no to some things and yes to the right things. I prioritize a small list of things to focus on. It has been difficult because my mind is always coming up with things I can do. But, prioritizing a focused list is forcing me to stay align and actually accomplish some things. I found out quickly I can’t do everything because I end up not finishing nothing.
I have the exact same problem as you, Bernard. That small list of things to focus on is a great idea. I did that for a couple of months and it made a huge difference but for some reason I haven’t kept it up. Thanks for the idea. I’ll have to get back to that!
Great points! I especially like #7. Since having my son I really understand that. I’m a workaholic and am so thankful God is showing me that people, not projects matter. It makes it easier to let some things slide.
I was a lazy person until the last six months or so – now I’m struggling with workaholism and sporadic laziness. I need to find that happy medium! And I’m guessing the more I remember #7, the more I’ll find that happy medium.
It’s not easy, but nothing is in our own power and limited knowledge.
God bless.
What overwhelms me are the big things-yearly business taxes, state auditing of my files every 2 years (the files are for each woman I care for in our Group Home), the County re-inspecting us and re-licensing us every year, and today its CPR AND First Aid re-traning for 3-4 hours. help!
It can take me months to prepare for licensing and auditing and on top of it the gal I hired is lazy!! (the state mandates I hire an “over-seer of our “program”) She is only one of 3 available to work with me because no one likes the job. I fired one of the others, and now God is showing me that sometimes you just trade difficult for difficult and my job is to be an example of His love to others but…………..!! Now I need a nap.
For years (way too many) I have been cycling workaholic-lazy-workaholic-lazy. I’ve never found my happy medium……………yet!
Sorry I guess this is more of a vent. I’ve been overwhelmed about todays CPR training since Sat. night. She comes in an hour and a half. ugh
I have been doing prayer verses. My heart is full of thankfulness, my stomach is doing flip-flops.
(((HUGS)))
HA! Just finshed our CPR/First aid a half hour early with the nicest woman that the Lord provided. Now why? Did I doubt Him? oy!
Yay! That worked out well! I’m with you on the laziness/workaholic syndrome. I thought it was unusual but have since learned it’s a regular thing – lots of people deal with it. At least we’re not strange, I guess. :)
Barb I am nodding right along as i read these points because am a work in all of them. # 7 brings such peace to my heart : )
I have many things that try to overwhelm me! My challenge is multitasking – doing many things at the same time and wanting to do them perfectly. I’d allowed this myth to get into my head; that I have limitless time and i can do all things i put my mind to do. it’s a big lie of course and am just learning (again) to keep 1st things first, accept some things might never get done, and pursue God’s main goal, and toss out my little “i-can-do-that-too” list.
Thanks for this reminder today!
Haha – I love the little “I-can-do-that-too” list, Ngina. I, too, am overly optimistic when it comes to how much I think I can get done. Maybe I could if I were super efficient 100% of the time, but unfortunately, I’m not! I’m learning to rest in God’s grace, not beat myself up, and continue to work on using my time better.
Renew your mind is such a treasure for me. I have to unplug, unwind, and allow my mind to stop processing data/info and making decisions. I’ve found that allows me to process what’s in my mind already. It allows me to reflect on life, on current situations, and on what I would like the future to look like. When I do this regularly it helps me have greater clarity and purpose.
I feel the same way, DS. Sometimes I don’t take the time to renew my mind when I get frazzled – but when I do, I always find that I work better. I have a morning quiet time which I always look forward to, but I really need to have more quiet time in the middle of the day to refocus.
Focus is so key. It’s funny to me how I can accomplish so much if I really have to – when deadlines are tight and that focus is mandatory. I also think evaluating your task list and deciding what not to do is crucial – your #3. This is tough, because you want to do everything. But you have to set priorities.
I can accomplish more, too, if deadlines are tight. One of the struggles of the stay at home mom is that time looms before us, so it’s easy to waste it. Most of our deadlines–mine anyway–are self-imposed.
I need help trying not to be overwhelmed with my homework, what do you think I should do?
Hmm, are you sure this isn’t one of my kids? If it is, I would stay, “Study!” :) But I’m going to assume you aren’t one of my kids and give you the longer version of the answer. :)
I think homework is tricky because you’re not working on just one goal, you’re working on a bunch of goals and it’s hard to juggle them. I have the same problem. If I’m just working on a book, I can get it done. But if I’m trying to get all kinds of unrelated things done, I have a harder time. So I’m not sure if I’m a very good person to ask! But I’ll give it a try anyway.
First, I would try to stay ahead of the game. It’s easy to put homework off in the beginning and when you do that, it all piles up and you feel overwhelmed and when you get really overwhelmed, it’s hard to make yourself do anything.
Second I would say to make a daily list of what you have to get done. Then plan your day – when do you have time to work on your homework? Be intentional about your time. Whenever you can’t make yourself do the homework, renew your mind. My new book has a whole section of questions and Bible verse (19 sets + some stress questions that are helpful) you can use to make yourself follow your to-do list (it’s the Starting a Habit/ Pursuing a Goal section).
Back when I was in college, I was so bored by homework, I could have really used those questions. Instead I went to the candy machine in my dorm, which was fun for 5 minutes, but not very productive! Plus it trained me to be a procrastinator for another 25 years probably. It’s nice to learn how to break that habit when you’re young!
Not sure if that was helpful, but I did just google how not to be overwhelmed with homework and this seems like good advice! Also, I just googled this and this seems like good advice: http://www.time-management-success.com/too-much-homework.html
Hope you get your homework done!