This week I felt like a total failure. I’d had several days in a row of wasting time on the internet, not getting a lot accomplished, and just being a general slug.
I spent some time with God renewing my mind, but it didn’t seem to be helping. Why am I writing a blog on overcoming bad habits, I thought, when I can’t even overcome my own?
Then God reminded me of how far I’ve come. Yes, I’m still an unorganized, unproductive sloth from the standpoint of an on-the-ball person, but I’m far better than I used to be. God is changing me – just not as fast as I’d like!
As I was working through my failure, it reminded me of how hard it is to break a bad habit or start a good habit. So today I want to post just a quick checklist of things that can help you with your battle to break a habit or start a habit.
Preparing for the Battle
- Set boundaries
- For information on this read the post on Boundaries.
- Get an accountability partner.
- Ask a friend to hold you accountable to the renewing of your mind each day. Your friend could also hold you accountable to starting or stopping your habit, but the renewing of the mind is even more important as you need to change the way you think if you want lasting change.
- Prepare your weapons.
- Collect some Bible verses on your habit so they’re ready when you need them. You could also put Bible verses on little cards around the house. You might also want to buy a journal and commit it to this particular project.
- Look for practical ways to minimize temptation.
- Yesterday I downloaded a program called Anti-social to help me eliminate the temptation to waste time on the internet. Is there anything you can do on a practical level to help youeliminate temptation?
During the Battle
- Start each day with God.
- Keep short accounts with God.
- Always try to renew your mind as soon as possible after temptation or defeat. It’s far easier to replace lies with truth when the lies are still at the”little” stage.
- Flee the situation when necessary.
- You may need to physically leave the location of your temptation. Or stop doing activities that lead you into temptation.
- Fight with spiritual weapons.
- Keep fighting with truth even when it doesn’t seem to be working. Today the truth kicked in for me after several days of floundering and feeling defeated. But it only kicked in because I spent several hours over the last few days renewing my mind.
After Defeat
- Resist the urge to beat yourself up.
- For more help on this, see the Bible study on failure.
- Renew your mind.
- If you renew your mind after defeat, it will help you resist temptation the next time you’re tempted.
- Remember that growth isn’t a straight line.
- Picture a stock market chart. It never goes straight up, even if the stock is soaring. It’s the same way with growth. We have a bunch of good days, then a bad day – maybe even a string of bad days. But as long as we keep going back to God and renewing our minds, the overall trend will be up.
- Focus on progress, not perfection.
- When you’re tempted to get discouraged, think of how far you’ve come. And be thankful for progress – even if it’s just a little progress!
And last, but not least, don’t give up!
For I am confident of this very thing, that He who began a good work in you will perfect it until the day of Christ Jesus. (Philippians 1:6)
Shall we press on together?
First Image courtesy of FreeDigitalPhotos.net
Loren Pinilis says
I feel your pain on this! For me, I’ve just had to remind myself of God’s grace – covering even how I waste my time. I also have to remember that it is his power within me that accomplishes anything worthwhile.
Barb says
Thanks, Loren – plus I think i need to listen to your last podcast again!
Kari Scare says
Thank you for your transparency. What you describe is what I think so many people struggle with but don’t admit. Getting it out in the open sure helps in defeating it. At least, that’s my experience. Keep up the great blog posts. Never giving up is the key. You’ll find that point here and there in my posts. Your process for breaking habits is sound. Would be a great seminar!
Barb says
Thanks for the encouragement, Kari. I appreciate it.
Deb says
Barb, What a practical and helpful plan. Thank you so much. My favorites . . . Prepare your weapons and Focus on progress, not perfection. I really needed those reminders. I agree with Kari, I believe you have the makings of a great seminar in this post. Blessings!
Barb says
Thanks, Deb – I might have to try that sometime. I’ve taught the material in 8 week long Bible studies, but it would also be fun to do in a seminar.
Kelly Combs says
Hi Barb! Thanks for coming by my blog today. I really enjoyed your post. I too can feel like a sloth when I spend time on the internet. Yet, as a writer, the amount of time I spend on the PC is expected. Boundaries are the key! I need to be better about WRITING, and stay off the social media. Thanks for the great takeaway today.
Dan Black on Leadership says
Glad to hear your human:) Thank you for sharing about your failure.
Great post and points. I think it’s so important to prepare for the battle before hand. Though no matter how prepared we can/could be we still will experience failures. During those times you listed some great points to remember.
Barb says
Haha, if only I were a little less human in the getting-things-done department – even for a week or so!
Dan Black on Leadership says
Ditto about that:)