• Start
    Here
    • Start Here
    • About Barb
    • Barb Raveling’s Books
    • Renew Your Mind Seminar
    • Leader’s Guides & Resources
    • Contact
  • Renew
    Your Mind
    • Renewing of the Mind Project
    • Renewing of the Mind Tools
    • Grow Closer to God
    • Transformation 101
    • Renewing Your Mind Bible Study
  • Bible
    Studies
    • Free Bible Studies
    • Leader’s Guides & Resources
    • Online Bible Studies
  • Live In
    Peace
    • How To Live in Peace
    • Anger
    • Worry/Fear
    • Depression & Discontentment
    • Insecurity
    • Stress
    • Boredom
    • Other Emotions
  • Pursue
    A Goal
    • How to Start a Habit
    • How to Pursue a Goal
    • Goals and Productivity
    • Ministry and Blogging
  • Lose
    Weight
    • How to Lose Weight
    • Weight Loss Resources, Classes, & FAQ
    • Taste for Truth Christian Weight Loss Podcast
    • Christian Weight Loss App
    • Weight Loss Bible Study
    • Weight Loss Blog Posts
  • Break
    A Habit
    • How To Break a Habit
    • Habits Blog Posts
  • Podcasts &
    Coaching
    • Coaching with Barb
    • Christian Habits Podcast
    • Taste for Truth Christian Weight Loss Podcast
    • Podcast Interviews

Barb Raveling

Tips, Tools, & Bible Studies to Renew Your Mind

Subscribe

  • Home
  • Podcasts
    • Taste for Truth Christian Weight Loss Podcast
    • Christian Habits Podcast
You are here: Home / Habits Blog Posts / If It Feels Good Do It . . . Or Not

If It Feels Good Do It . . . Or Not

April 20, 2012 By: Barb Raveling

This post may contain affiliate links. View our disclosure policy here.

Living in a culture that incessantly preaches the message if it feels good do it, it’s hard to grow up embracing boundaries.

We think the good life is a life without boundaries . . . but is it?

Just think of your own bad habit: what happens when you do what you want, when you want? Take a minute to close your eyes and fully answer that question.

Do you live a well-balanced, peaceful life, enjoying the pleasures of your habit without regret?

Or do you live a defeated and discouraged life, always wishing you hadn’t gone quite so far with your habit?

Would your life be better with boundaries or without boundaries? I’m not talking about the next five minutes, but your overall life.

If we want to break free from our bad habits, we have to get this idea out of our heads that the good life is a life without boundaries. Because that idea is a lie.

What is a life without boundaries really like?

When I hold my desires in a clenched fist—like I often do with my time, refusing to work on my to-do list—I’m not happy.

Jobs pile up. I’m unorganized. I’m overwhelmed. And I never get enough free time to satisfy me.

When I unclench my fists and say, Okay, God, whatever you want, I’ll do it—I’m a much more structured person. I follow the rules. I work on my list. I do things I don’t want to do.

But you know what? I’m a lot happier that way.

Does your habit control you?

Why? Because I’m no longer being controlled by my indulgent nature that says, Satisfy me. Make me happy. Give me more.

When I’m looking for my habit to fill me up, I never get enough to satisfy me. I’m like the broken cistern in Jeremiah 2:13:

For my people have committed two evils: They have forsaken Me, the fountain of living waters, to hew for themselves cisterns, broken cisterns that can hold no water.

What’s the solution?

So what’s the solution? Keep trying to find the perfect life that will fill me up? Keep trying to use self-control to keep my habit in line?

Or keep going to God and learn how to be filled up with Him so I won’t want my habit so much?

The solution for both holiness and happiness is the same: I don’t need more habit. I need more God.

And I get more of Him when I hold my habit with open hands.

 What do boundaries really do for you?

Boundaries help me unclench my fists from the things that have a tendency to control me. They are life-enriching, God-honoring safeguards that help me live life to the fullest because they help me keep God first in my life.

When the world tells me the good life is doing what-I-want-when-I-want, it’s telling me a lie.

Questions for your journal: Think about your renewing of the mind project. What does your life look like when you live without boundaries in regard to your habit? What would it look like if you lived with boundaries? Which is the better life? Why? How does Matthew 10:37-39 apply to your project?

Questions for discussion: When Jesus got upset with the Pharisees about legalism, was He upset with the fact that they had rules or was He upset about something else? At what point, if any, do rules (or boundaries) lead us away from God? In what way do they lead us toward God?

Related Posts:

  • How to Stop Being Angry – 12 Tips
  • How to Meditate on Scripture
  • 10 Lies that Make Us Give Up on New Year's Resolutions
3 shares
  • Share2
  • Tweet

Comments

  1. Kari Scare says

    April 20, 2012 at 11:24 am

    My first thought when I read the title to this post was of another related post that could be titled, “If it doesn’t feel good, stop doing it.” What I mean by this is the idea that people are so proned to only do what feels good, and as soon as something starts to not feel good or feel uncomfortable, they quit doing it. Just an idea…

    Questions for discussion: I think Jesus was upset because the Pharisees were preventing people from getting to Jesus. They had heaped up so many rules that people couldn’t get through them to find forgiveness, hope, love, etc. They just found condemnation at their inabiliteis to keep the rules. It’s at this point that rules/boundaries lead us away from God. He knows we’re not perfect and will make mistakes, and so we need to be able to find our way to His loving arms of forgiveness. Boundaries lead us toward God when they keep us under His umbrella of protection and blessing and when they help us find His forgiveness and grace. Oh yeah, they are helpful for minimizing consequences in our lives too.

  2. Barb Raveling says

    April 20, 2012 at 1:33 pm

    Good suggestion on a related blog post, Kari – I can certainly relate to that as I’ve had to struggle through that feeling with writing. Plus I like your insights on Jesus and the Pharisees. I wonder if we do that in the church today (heap too many rules on people, I mean). It doesn’t seem like we do, but maybe?

    • Anonymous says

      April 20, 2012 at 2:41 pm

      Sometimes, yes I think the church heaps too many rules on people. But, I think society heaps too many rules on the church too. It’s a two-way street. Finding a church that is what my pastor calls a “grace church” has been one of the best experiences in my life. It is not perfect, but the body as a whole certainly does attempt to walk in grace.

      • Kari Scare says

        April 20, 2012 at 2:44 pm

        The above “anonymous” comment is from me. I accidentally hit “post comment” before I finished. I hate it when I do that!

      • Barb Raveling says

        April 20, 2012 at 4:52 pm

        I didn’t think of it that way (that society heaps rules on the church), but you’re right. Interesting. I can see their point, though. If we claim that Jesus makes a difference, then they expect the church to look different. And if they don’t see us looking different, they shout, “hypocrite!” Another reason to work on transformation – to reflect Christ well. Sounds like you have a great church

        • Kari Scare says

          April 23, 2012 at 4:08 pm

          We definitely need to be held to a higher standard as Christians. After all, we can’t expect non-Christians to act like Christians, can we? Nor can we be surprised when they act like, well, non-Christians. Christians definitely need to work on reflecting Christ well and helping non-Christians understand that we are just being perfected and are not yet perfect. I have an awesome church!

  3. Barb Raveling says

    April 23, 2012 at 5:03 pm

    I agree that we need to work on reflecting Christ well. People who know us well will be able to tell if we’re being perfected or not because they’ll either see us growing and changing from year to year, or they’ll see the same old faults from year to year. The more we grow, the better we’ll be able to love – and it’s love that will attract people to God. Not to mention the fact that the better we are at loving, the more likely others will be to extend us grace when we need it.

    • Kari Scare says

      April 23, 2012 at 6:11 pm

      Well said. Green and growing or ripe and rotting. People can tell the difference!

  4. Barb Raveling says

    March 28, 2013 at 6:19 am

    When I switched my blog to a self-hosted account last month, some of the comments switched their order. So if you read these comments and they don’t make sense, that’s why – they’re out of order!

Search Blog

Connect with us online

  • Facebook
  • Instagram
  • Pinterest
  • YouTube

Popular Posts

  • Spiritual Attack: 10 Tips for Spiritual Warfare
  • How to Meditate on Scripture
  • How To Renew Your Mind
  • How to Make Yourself Exercise and Renew with Anna
  • Weight Loss Bible Study: Day 1
  • 35: 7 Ways to Get Closer to God
  • How to Overcome Insecurity with God’s Help
  • When Life is Boring: 10 Questions & 9 Bible Verses
  • 29: 6 Steps to Breaking Free From Self-Condemnation
  • Christian Accountability Partner: A Beginner’s Guide

Archives

Categories

  • Anger
  • Bible Studies/Worksheets
  • Boredom
  • Christian Habits Podcast
  • Depression/Discontentment
  • Goals and Productivity
  • Grow Closer to God
  • Habits Blog Posts
  • Insecurity
  • Letting Go of Negative Emotions
  • Marriage
  • Ministry and Blogging
  • Other Emotions
  • Stress
  • Transformation 101
  • Uncategorized
  • Weight Loss Blog Posts
  • Weight Loss Podcast
  • Worry/Fear
Scripture quotations taken from the NASB (www.lockman.org).
Copyright © 2023 • Custom blog design by The Pixelista • Built on the Genesis Framework
This website uses cookies to improve your experience. We'll assume you're ok with this, but you can opt-out if you wish. Cookie settingsACCEPT
Privacy & Cookies Policy

Privacy Overview

This website uses cookies to improve your experience while you navigate through the website. Out of these cookies, the cookies that are categorized as necessary are stored on your browser as they are essential for the working of basic functionalities of the website. We also use third-party cookies that help us analyze and understand how you use this website. These cookies will be stored in your browser only with your consent. You also have the option to opt-out of these cookies. But opting out of some of these cookies may have an effect on your browsing experience.
Necessary
Always Enabled
Necessary cookies are absolutely essential for the website to function properly. This category only includes cookies that ensures basic functionalities and security features of the website. These cookies do not store any personal information.
Non-necessary
Any cookies that may not be particularly necessary for the website to function and is used specifically to collect user personal data via analytics, ads, other embedded contents are termed as non-necessary cookies. It is mandatory to procure user consent prior to running these cookies on your website.
SAVE & ACCEPT